The crazy world of B Shool Con-Tests!

‘Your e-mail has been sent’
Nothing really significant about the message displayed above that we all see flash after we send our everyday mundane mails to every corner of the globe. But It is when it is when the mail you have just sent is to an institute that has organized a paper presentation or a case analysis contest.
It seems to be the current rage amongst the entire B-School fraternity, at least here in SCMHRD. Everyone whose anyone seems to have an acquired a PhD for Paper Dissertations or a Joseph Stiglitz for Case Studies. As usual Its up to be to see why and what motivates my fellow mates to engage in such behavior:

Hmm..as usual money motivates us mortals to a large extent. Its funny here to see the behavior exhibited in this rather competitive time period. A simple example is formation of teams. Do I take my roomie/best friend/girl friend/the intelligent guy/the hot chick… Each of them possesses their own unique set of pros/cons which are quite obvious. It again depends on your objective mentioned in the pie chart. If you want to win= intelligent guy. If you want knowledge= do it with best friend/roomie & for time pass= hot chick. The trick here is to find a hot chick who is intelligent and is fun to work with. They are a dying breed but exist.

Another thing is its better to have people from different specializations a.k.a possess complimentary skills to those that you possess(if any). Typically for a 2 member team you want a Mark+Fin and for a 3 member throw in an operations guys. And there HAS to be someone who is good in creating flashy presentations in PowerPoint as that is quite an art itself. And I have realized that its better to have 3 not so intelligent Hardworking guys rather than 1 smart guy and 2 lazy bums in a team. The former will always deliver better results. Also, a lot of luck is involved. Lets face it, its judged by blokes who were just like you and me.
Its practically raining contests here in the IIIrd semester. Every B school worth its AICTE certification(seems that organizing fests is a criterion to get a certification!). Typically these are what is offered on the platter:

1) B-Plans: Standard Boiler Plate. I avoid them as its too detailed, cant plagiarize and requires too much originality. I leave this to the Gujjus & the really smart guys who have been dreaming of business plans since they could read. Eg: IIT-B Ecell’s Eureka. My Current Score : 0/1

2) Finance Valuation Cases: Grimace and move on. This is purely number crunching and finance concepts tested to the core. My roommate who is amongst the top 1% in finance concepts would go for stuff like this and I watch from behind. If you’re a marketing guy don’t even think you can faff your way as this is just a no for that kind of thing. Pure Concepts only. Eg: The Deal by JPMC. My Current Score: N.A

3) Paper Presentations(All Specs): This is the bread & butter that even you and me can do. Topics range from outsourcing to brazil to Balancing Scorecards. Doesn’t require too much domain knowledge. Just smart googling and referring HBR’s. This has maximum attempt rates across students as its all over the net, you just have to put it down right with correct flow. My Current Score 0/2

4) Marketing Case Studies: Now this is where the action lies. Carries higher status and prize money(rightly) . Typically involves a fictional company which has to get out of a rut or wants to do make millions overnight and decided that we are the messiahs who can save them. They are quite fun & challenging and makes you apply what little you have learnt practically which is quite satisfying. Fierce competition though and you can expect the best of brains here. Helps to have a finance guy on board or atleast consult and repair the absurd financials you have projected. I will never forget the look on my fin-guru-roomie’s face when I showed him my cash flows for a case. He doubted if I could even put on my pants correctly every morning after that. My Current Score 0/3

5) Online games: Fun, for the no so serious, involves quizzes or puzzles and fast googling again within a time limit. Very slim chances as there are people who specialize in these and have like a small cabal of people who wait for the games like a rocket countdown working on 5 computers at a time. Quite a sight. My Current Score 0/3.

6) Culturals: Meant for those who are ‘alternatively talented’ or hate any form of academic activity. Involved dancing,debating,dumb charades & singing. We have a quite of few of them right here. Only downside/upside is going to the host’s campus is mandatory, a nice way to see another B School but considerable monetary expenditure involved. My Current Score : N.A
As you might have inferred from the above post, so far my brilliant insights haven’t impressed the jury. I would like to blame the govt on this but I don’t think that’s fair. My CV for this semester will continue to ride off my cough past glory cough. And its not like I’ve got a PPO from my beloved summer company that’s really helping matters.
My pal told me although I’ve struck nothing but ground zero the last million times, I shouldn’t give up trying as the next one could just be it. But it seems like all of ‘em are independent events..aren’t they?

Well..at the end of it, it’s the guys who win these who are the real dudes of the campus and have managed to really learn and apply it. Of course they are not guaranteed a CEO post and those who don’t make the cut will not end up employed serving food in the college mess..

Wonder if yellow & black looks good on me.

Financial Statement Analysis of a B-School Student..

I’ve been running short of cash lately and I realize that to maintain my current lifestyle I need to make some hard cash fast. I realized from my Financial Management class there is a very simple rule:

Cash Inflow - Cash Outflows= Net Cash Position

So basically to have a big R.H.S, I need to increase my inflows or reduce my outflows. Let’s look at each of them shall we?

CASH INFLOWS

1) The SBI ATM: This is my two month summers’ salary from Amex but let’s face facts this ain’t gonna last forever. And every walk to the atm & withdrawal from it makes me feel guilty; the watchman looks at me like I am a heist man. This added to the fact that I think after my new Sony Ericsson K510i and my ahem entertainment expenses in Delhi during summers has brought this figure down by half. Don’t ask me what the original was.

2) B-School Contests: Yea..I decided to try my hand at these..From paper presentations to Case Analysis…it seems either all of ‘em know that I plagiarize or I have the mental faculty of a escaped lunatic from Alcatraz or I’m a escaped lunatic from Alcatraz who plagiarizes. Added to the fact that I am financially challenged (in both ways, I claim to be a marketing major) so my focus point is quite narrow. And the completion in this acclaimed segment is as populous as the number of CAT aspirants. Ah well, I’m sure the ‘winners’ of these papers will be no match for me when it comes to the real thing. Yes. I’m sure. (Note to Raghav-Keep telling yourself that every night.)

3) Quizzes: My so called ‘core-competency’ (hey, I do know some stuff in marketing!) has given me the bum ride this semester. My only consolation (I call it sadistic plot of God) is that I end up as the ‘team that just missed qualification/ or the guys who tied last but couldn’t get the starred question’. I just have to settle for being the smartest guy in the audience and win prizes there. Either my reading is not up to the mark or people have become more well aware of what the hell’s going on around town.

4) Contests & Scams on the Net: Once in a while I always come across a story of how you can make 1000 $ a day with no skill required just 1 hour a day. Seems tailor made for a guy like me but they never seem to work. I shamefull admit the fact I signed up for a site that makes u click like about 30 ads a day and you get like 2 rs in return. I stopped after a week. Im expecting my cheque for..a cool 7 bucks(less taxes/membership/manual costs) in about 500 million years.

5) Stock Markets: Im still trying to break even from the 10 G’s my Dad gave me in my own sharekhan.com account. It seems that I have a knack for picking those stocks that either the CEO kills himself , the promoters run off or the industry which the company operates on is no longer in existence. (For a copy of my winning portfolio, drop me a line at Raghav_r24@rediffmail.com). And even with the spare cash I have there are 10,00 brokers here who have 1291032*e^2344 HOT stock tips. I realized that there is a formulae that accurately captures winning in markets

Money in Markets= Capital over 10,000 * Reliable Sources for information* Patience to wait atleast year * Shares Allocated in good IPO’s * Having a demat account* having a demat account which you know the password for* knowledge on executing a transaction.

I HEREBY DECLARE I HAVE NONE OF THE ABOVE REQUIREMENTS.

There are some sources of funds that shall remain unlisted for personal reasons lest the parties who are involved are aware of such incidents occurring. Let’s just say that It seems to be the last resort.

CASH OUTFLOWS

1) Food: The biggest expenditure for me by far. It’s just that the mess food here that is served is quite frankly, a mess. I hoped I’m not sued for libel or slandering. I guess I will use the fact that the last 21 years of having delicious home cooked food has set my standards sky high with a very low standard deviation of being a connoisseur of this God-Awful cuisine. I am the largest benefactor of Sweety Stores(the local retail food guy on campus) in terms of his ‘bun-donuts’ product line. I think the CEO of that company is cancelling his IPO because I’m giving that SOB all the capital he needs to raise from the primary markets. (For those who want to become millionaires, contact me I’ll tell u the name of the company, invest now and by the time u retire your old ass them shares will be worth 10x the current mkt price)

2) Dating: Well, I can’t write too much here, for obvious reasons If I want to continue. I’ve been lucky, as it revolves around the concept related to the Netherlands. If u did not get that (Im not surprised, it rhymes with a telecom company that is no longer what it was known as) But let me tell you one thing- Pune and its merry hang-abouts don’t come cheap.

3) Treats: This unholy event occurs with a certain sporadic ir-regularity. Its not like I have achieved feats of greatness [One I have, and a treat is due =, guys u’ll get it @ the end of this year I promise ] We here just need a reason to make the other guy take us out to dinner. It can range from as important as passing in a backlog paper, attending class on time, accidently bumping into a hot chick on campus or putting on the right pair of socks to stuff like staying home for 2 months for one’s internship. This if your lucky can be postponed but birthdays and personal accidents , you’d wish you’d never had those.

4) Twilight Zone Treats: Hmm..how do I put this..lets say you had a fixed agenda of going on to dinner with some people in your mind. Now you accidently see that more people invite themselves or run into them or meet them at your destination which compounds things and upsets your pre –established frame of reference. This becomes all the more worse if the parties are cannibals and guzzlers and you are told that the order of the day is well..the doubled edged sword of the Netherlanders.

5) Laundry: Seems to be an essential function that cannot be compromised on. The irony is that I think I do a better job cleaning that the dude on campus. Am waiting for him to lose a pair of pants so I can get credit for atleast 700 bucks that takes care of this expense for the rest of the year. (Some guy in my campus pulled this stunt and the pants were worth as much as a politicians promise)

6) Contributions for Social Events: Includes contribution for Freshers, Jobbers, Losers..some goddamn event or the other where appointed agents will knock your door down till they get the cash payment. I recommend they join ICICI’s loan recovery cell. I don’t deny I too have fun but such a large capital expenditure for 1 night seems quite pointless. I DON’T want a loser DJ, I DON’T care for carbonated drinks and what I DO CARE about is atleast good dessert, not some vanilla crap with raisins in them. Hurts my taste buds and my wallet.

7) Fines, fines and fines: Ranging from 5 for an overdue library book to 500 for a missed guest lecture..I protest both the counts, the 1st I should be exempted from as honestly one of the most active proponents of reading and the 2nd as I really don’t give a damn on who comes. And if you honestly think that you’re worth 500 a student who missed a seat on your hall, you are in the wrong business. Join the pony tail management guy in his scam.

As can been seen, there seems to be more outflows than inflows by far. And my NPV of my Net cash position I negative. And I realize that my income is fixed. I will continue to siphon money from my parents and never win any contest. It seems the pain areas to work on are my outflows..Now let me see which area can I reduce on..hmm..(draws a blank..) . Say…do people really make money off their blogs..? Nah..I ain’t even that funny and I’m grammatically challenged.

Ecoutez Vous..s’il vous plait!

Just saw Shootout at Lokhandwala- great movie, but the highlight for me was the song Ganpat Rap. Here’s the video :-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hhNGeZCUgaE

Did a wiki on this(as always on all movies for interesting trivia) and landed by with Bombay Boys ka link..and that hit a cord in my brain that I loved this song too!! Video of Bombay boys..

M.B.A, Interrupted: Curtain Call for End of 1st Year

 

 

 

Let us observe a moment of silence..not for India’s exit from the World Cup, but since today was the last day of our 1^st Year as MBA’s at SCMHRD. Done? Ok.. On 29^th of March, we gave our Man.Accting paper, the last paper in the long list of exams(probably a backlog, the questions from the last 2 years paper’s which I had mugged and gone were no where to be seen. Lucky me.)

 

The guys in the hostel were all going home before summers and busy with throwing out with relish the books they thought they would never use. I could see the raw satisfaction in the eyes of my crazed mates as they vehemently threw the numerous Xerox’s (ok photocopies for the politically correct) of the Econometrics/Accountancy notes. Some even went to the extent of labeling them as “Burn in Hell you #$%^&*” ( Only for mature audiences) . I understand your pain boys.

 

Incidentally I still have my Fin Man,Man Acct papers, better safe then sorry. The Indian Cricket team has a better chance of winning the world cup in Synchronized Swimming in the Sahara Desert Sands then I do of clearing my Accounting papers. People scoff at me now for keeping all this ‘trash’, but I will have the last laugh. I predict now its value is nothing but in a years time when we have to give the re-exams with the juniors, its worth will sky rocket like an InfoSys ADR and a chance to score with the junior chicks who need our ‘experience’

 

Me and my roomie(raja) stripped our room naked (and ourselves to bare minimum with war paint donned on to get into the groove of destroying/tearing stuff with occasional animal like war cries) of all our belongings and hastily dumped them in anything that would hold stuff. ( I managed to put in a unused RIN bar in between my Business Statistics Book, which incidentally I spent Rs 350 for , never used it and got 1 more free from college and am still trying to get out a piece of rubber lodged in my right eardrum..so much capacity utilization!).

 

I found other interesting stuff while clearing out my closet : My 1 black sandal (the other one is still missing), my broken pink umbrella (I want to lose this I never can…dammit!), my moth infested T-shirt, a new pack of Gillette Mach III blades (yea the cool ones as in the ad with the hot babe running her hand over the guy’s ‘mached’ cheek..I thought I had no blades, so threw off the razor..Smart move huh? )… and some stuff that is quite illegal in these parts of the country but legal in No 15, Afghanistan Farm Road, Afghanistan. (For those who stopped and re-read this line, yea, it is a rip-off of Chandlers line @ Friends). So Sue me.

 

We have left the most important books in our rooms itself (Vedanta, Indian Economy-6^th edition, Six Sigma Manual) so that the lucky junior who gets our room will get a head start ahead of his peers. Purely done out of space constraints. Cellophane tape is the most sought after commodity whilst packing and we lost about 25% of the tape trying to get it evenly out as most of the times it would split into two halves as one takes it from the roll! Even if you do manage to get the tape across the carton, the scissors would not be within proximity for cutting the tape. (Animal War Cry here).

 

We took a couple of pics of our room 839 just for old time’s sake and made our mark present to show the world (3 juniors in this case) that this was the crib where the rockstars Raghav and Raja were chillin! Goodbyes for guys are a very difficult thing..I mean however close you are its difficult..so we were actin like them niggas..you know clenched hands punching, chest slamming and a firm handshake( like when bond Vs the bad guy saying this ain’t over yet).

 

1)Outside our legendary room..to be turned into a museum shortly.

 

2) Smart Camera work..guess where the camera is ? Btw, u can see three brushes in the pic, 1 for each of us and 1 and till date we don’t know who/how the third brush came along..we auctioned it for a half used tube of shaving cream.

 

 

 

The train journey back home (Chennai not California this time) was a blast as we encountered colorful personalities ( Transvestites/ ‘Ombodhus’-9 in Tamil) as we passed AP. Raja had a bad experience with them earlier so as soon as he spotted a trio he ran and locked himself in the toilet for 5 mins. They came and asked me for cash told them in my most polished English to GTFO off my face and they cursed me with 7 years of bad luck. (Ironically today was the last day of the 3 year curse I had from a midget in the Jumbo Circus who I did not wave to after he was shot out off a cannon. Damn 1 curse lifted and lo comes another…!) We (I and Prashanth G) in fact let Raja wait in the bathroom for an extra 2 minutes ;p He thought he had the last laugh when they returned and he had to pay up five big ones to satisfy their collections..lol it was a sight I’d never forget in a hurry..As usual Murphys law would apply to us and our train was delayed in a No-Mans-Land station for over 2 hours (The most technologically advanced thing in that station was a modified analog watch whose hour hand outpaced the second hand). Finally we reached at 8:00 am and left for home..

 

 

 

The second semester for me personally has been the best 5 odd months of my life. Summer Placements for juniors , Admissions Drive(went home), placements for seniors where me with the help of hospitality girls earned back 10% of the investment here and last but definitely not the least in any sense, our cultural fest Neev, (the foundation..in more than 1 way for me ;p ) .

 

D-Hostel had a lot of special memories for me…my 1^st home away from home, great neighbors in all the directions (Roy’s /Aravind’s/Prashanth’s), the midnight birthday bashes(random beating, roomie beating and bakra beating), the TT & TV room, the Nepalese-Guys run Canteen (who scoffed at me saying he has SAARC & u, India can’t even qualify for the super 8, wondered if I should be stunned at his GK levels or die in ignominy of shame of India’s Cricketing skills ) who made the best pyass paratas (Im assuming these were good I don’t have a benchmark I’ve never eaten it before) , the walks to the same canteen on nights where you don’t need even feel hungry but just want to hang with friends in the cool zephyr at 3 am, the basket ball & Volley ball court, the laundry room where I 1^st heard my favorite song ‘kya muje pyar hain’ the mess which served the worst food but by the most friendly mess guys. U rock dudes.

 

The rooms of D-hostel might be barren, but the corridors of the same will be always filled with the wonderful memories that the we had the last 10 months..

 

 

Dedicated to: All the guys @ D-hostel, and special callout to Khaitan G (scroll down to see a clown decked up in orange!). Thanks Man, great knowing you..U made IInd sem what It is for me……I owe you big time for you know what..;p

PS: We will get that Venezuela report published at McCkinsey

Of Birthdays,Money, & Transformations..

Sorry for the delayed update..ever since I turned 22 last this February 24th, I guess a couple of million brain cells died out..about half of them attributed to loss of the memory and the rest have killed out any creativity that I had(You can just Alt+F4 right away and save yourself the trouble). After the customary butt bashing/body in air/juice on jeans/water on shirt/cake on face, I finally had hit the big 22!

Before 00:00 hours, before the madness began, got my wishes from my well wisher(s)..so that steeled me for the road ahead. I was advised by my knowledgeable friend Prashanth G to ‘dress’ up for the occasion, so wore my trusty jeans that according to the tag on it:

• Had survived 1000 tons of high speed sand blasting.
• Shrugged of extreme heat/cold @ the sahara & Tundra respectively.
• Been rolled over a million times by a Mahindra and Mahindra “MONSTER DX” Road Roller

But I guess there is one test they had not conducted, that’s a Mob that hates your guts. Added to that a Sales and Distribution Exam the next day was all they needed..they all got a big kick out of it.. and my poor butt had to bear the brunt.. At 00:00 hours, I could see myself being slowly led into the corridor like a man headed to the gallows..I’ll let the pictures to the talking now..

1)A Pack of Dabur Real Juice dumped on me..It was all over me, I tried to have a few gulps of the same along the way , did not taste all that good, I found out later it was a month old..

2)Vanilla Cake+Juice = Not the best dessert combination

3)The Mob displaying their proud work of Art..

4)My Bday cake, courtesy Prashanth G ( ‘REC/Nancy Boy ’ is how he is referred to here)

After the frenzy, had to get cleaned up so stepped into the bathroom when Sachin(Our official Birthday photographer) decided that the world needed to see a bit more of me..

Stage Fear..at first..

To..Ok..maybe just one for the shutterbugs….

…To finally, shedding more than just camera shyness Yea, maybe my underwear hanging in the background isn’t the best value addition.. But my awesome physique should make sure your eyes don’t wander anywhere else..

OK..temporary stop to the picture madness..

At 8:00 am left for SIBM for our Perfetti Market Research finals and ended up 3rd finally..and we did not even get a participant cert L Added to the fact that we were just given about 7 minutes for our presentation while the rest got the standard 20 minutes made the grapes even sourer! Ah well I guess we had to drown our sorrows in some very delectable sambhar-vada and eye the nattily dressed babes there ;p

Back to the college campus for the ‘official’ cake cutting and got my 2nd set of Birthday bumps in front of the cafeteria and two more lovely buckets of ice cold water thrown on me at 11:30 at night! Spent about an hour on campus, which turned out to be the best part of my entire day and made sure that it was probably the most memorable birthday I’ve had.. The next day me and my quizzer buddy managed to win 4k in cash and a reliance internet data card (another 4k) in an in house held SCMHRD Entrepreneurship quiz Man..did I need that money bad or what!

I now am more motivated to participate in B school events, what ever it is from watching paint dry to if the food made by the dudes in the mess are really employed by Tammanna or if they are really former chefs at Tihar Jail… It used to be just for me, the cash, the certificates, the name..but it seems that they have become secondary now..I have become secondary to myself…#1 is occupied, not by me though.…

Ok couldn’t help myself….

6 months ago…

And Now..

Atkins/VLCC etc, I’m feeling benevolent so here I reveal to you the secrets of my transformation*..

• Bad Food
• Really bad food
• No time to eat the bad food
• No time to buy good food
• No money to buy good food
• No time to eat what good food I could buy
• Girl(s)

*Not in any particular order….Interestingly have you read C.K.Prahalad’s bestselling book, fortune at the bottom of the pyramid?

PS: My apologies to anyone offended my pictures..My target audience are undertakers, girls over the age 18 and straight males.

Why?

 

 

1. Why is that the very 1^st time I saw you I knew something was going to happen?
2. Why is that I am tongue tied when I try to talk to you?
3. Why is that my senses are blacked out when I see you?
4. Why is that I listen to the same song for over an hour at 1 am in the night?
5. Why does it seem that the lyrics were meant for me?
6. Why do I sleep with the cell phone clutched in my hands?
7. Why is it like the pure rays of the moon on me when it rings?
8. Why is that to stop thinking of you I have to find a mundane task?
9. Why have I have failed miserably at the above?
10. Why is that I’d walk a mile just at the thought of seeing you?
11. Why is that I enjoy the walk from D hostel to Campus?
12. Why is that every thing we share is worth more than an ounce of gold?
13. Why is that you are my theme for dream?
14. Why is the fact that this will not happen be my nightmare?
15. Why do I overanalyze everything?
16. Why am I trying to cut the guardian knot?
17. Why is that I have to force myself to adapt to your nature?
18. Why does my heart stop when I hear something out of the ordinary from you?
19. Why is the log containing over 15447 words?
20. Why is that you are all what I can talk about to anybody?
21. Why do I thank the Director for the Venezuela Project?
22. Why have I spent more time on this than on a WAC case?
23. Why is there such a sea change in my behavior?
24. Why did I not get into the Burman Company?
25. Why do I smile I listen to Cliff Richards?
26. Why does it pain me when I listen to Madonna?
27. Why is that you decide what I listen too?
28. Why is that the sound of your voice gives me goose pimples?
29. Why can I manage with just 4 hours of sleep a day?
30. Why is that I can recall every single detail of any of our rendezvous?
31. Why is that so many words now start to mean so much more now?
32. Why is that Casino Royale is now my most memorable movie?
33. Why is that I have blogged more in these 2 months than my whole life?
34. Why is that every post has something to do with you?
35. Why did I lose the 1^st six months?
36. Why are Bus Rides back so memorable yet painful?
37. Why do I keep looking at the artifacts of our voyages?
38. Why do I wonder what’s the reason you did not reply?
39. Why am I writing this at 2:40 am ?
40. Why can’t I dance for God’s sake?
41. Why were you part of my quiz?
42. Why do I sleep with a smile on my face after I talk you?
43. Why do I suffer from amnesia the very next morning?
44. Why am I reading books on topics which I’d never read on?
45. Why did I get up early last Sunday?
46. Why is that your one smile makes my day?
47. Why is that your very frown wrecks the same?
48. Why is that not seeing you everyday makes me feel incomplete?
49. Why is that you can take me to the sky?
50. Why is that you can crash me into the ground?
51. Why is that we have to keep waiting?
52. Why did we miss out on homecoming?
53. Why did V day almost become D day?
54. Why is that you are the last thing that’s on my mind before I sleep?
55. Why is that you are the first thing that’s on my mind after I wake up?
56. Why is that I am staring into your eyes right now?
57. Why does everything around me remind me of you?
58. Why have you done this to me?

Two

Semesters nearly through

Walks across the street

Movies so far

Bonds of Spies

Packs of Kernels

Times tilt of head on pillar

Coffees on a street-side

Missed chances when biding goodbye

 

 

a.m. the best time of the night

Hours, the current record

Little time to see each other

Days of gross misunderstandings

 

Many to fight off

Insecure and Irrational

 

Who supported

Who upset the balance

Who have got the ‘like’ status

Who made it this far

 

Risky to go ahead but;

Painful to let go

 

Days

Weeks

Months

.

.

.

.

Years

 

gather

 

Us.

 

 

 

(For those who did not get it, the catch is to prefix “2″ or “To” before each line, the fonts will guide you on which one goes before which line..did not want to say this as it kills the mood..but God have been getting feedback that my poetic blogs are like the RC section in CAT 2005! )

MURPHY’S Laws at SCMHRD

Pareto’s FCQ Law: 80% of the time you study for the wrong FCQ and as a result end up with 20% of the marks

Cell’s Law: The time you go to the bathroom is exactly when your cellphone will ring the only time the entire day

Assignment’s Law: When you spend 2 hours working on an assignment all by yourself by taking the initiative, you realize that it was totally unrelated to the actual project

Time’s Law: The class where the professor expects you to be on time exactly will always be the first class of the day

Orkut’s Law: When using a special proxy server to access orkut, the tasteful flash ads will appear as your director passes by.

Pre Quiz’s Law: The 1st time you win the quiz on stage will be at a no name college and the prize will consist of a trophy (nameless and to be given to the college) and 2 certificates. You will not even be on quiz to collect the same.

Quiz’s Law: When on quiz for a quiz in front of the home crowd for a quiz, you will be in the worst of forms.

Extension of Quiz’s Law: When the home crowd leaves after seeing you have no chance is when you make the comeback of the decade.

Hyper Extension of Quiz’s Law: The prize you win after your remarkable comeback will include tea bags, masala packs, salt and pepper shakers, two useless books. Anyone who participated in the prelims would also get the same certificate as you got. And your name would be spelt wrong.

Knowledge’s Law: You will be a stud in the subject which you have never studied your whole life which you will never use. But your specialization+ background+summers subject you will need assistance from someone who has heard of it the 1st time in his life. And he will end up getting more marks than you.

SMS’s Law: When you are expecting a message at 1 am in the morning from someone special it will be from the Airtel operator telling you that the if you don’t recharge you will die in 3 days.

Excel’s Law: When you think you finally master a function after 20 minutes of hair tearing and cursing , you discover that it was probably voted “Most Useless Function of the year 2006” by Exceltip.com –

Example – NEGBINOMDIST: (Returns the negative binomial distribution. NEGBINOMDIST returns the probability that there will be number-f failures before the number-s’th success, when the constant probability of a success is probability-s.)

Anonymous’ Law: When you want to remain hidden when you are with someone else is when the biggest loudmouth will see you and make sure that everyone knows what is going on between the both of you.

Power’s Law: The one day when you bring your laptop to college for official work, you get this plan to goof off by writing blogs such as this is when you realize that it is only 30% charged and you have a good 6 hours of class left.

Extension of Power’s Law: You would have forgotten to get the LAN cable and the charger does not work and as you try to update your 2 year old antivirus using a fake serial key, you get a message that the key was already used by some wise guy in North Slovenia.

Study’s Law: Your friend who you decided to team up with to study accounts a week before the big exam will have the busiest week of his life and will turn up at 12:00 at night your door with a sheepish smile when you are just ready to hit the sack or have another agenda lined up.

Hindi Song’s Law: The one hindi song which you listen to everywhere- the laundry room, at a hotel, on the radio which really rocks and you want to get it desperately. Then you realize that when you ask your friend to give you the song, one of this will happen- You forget, you can’t sing or he himself has not heard of it. ( I did manage to finally get it(thanks Matsye!, its ‘Kya mujhe Pyar hain-remix’ from Woh Lamhe, which ironically does not feature a song called Woh Lambhe, another movie..yea I don’t get it too!.)

Free Class’s Law: Out of the III divisions A/B/C/ , your division will be the lot who get a 2 hour class free in between two classes. So unlike the other divisions, one set can get up late the other will leave early whilst you are battling what to do in the 2 hour gap. 2 hours are the worst time period, you don’t know if it’s long enough to go back to the hostel or small enough a period to sleep in an empty library cubicle.

Fine List’s Law: The one time you feel reckless and bunk a guest lecture/batch meet you see that your name heads the fine list (rs 500, up from 200).

Door’s Law: Just when you snuggle into your blankets with the lights off ready to sleep , you will hear a knock on your door, its your neighbor who wants to chit chat. (Worse case scenarios include the paper guy, Sharath and Somnath(the cleaner guys)

Extension of Door’s Law: Your bed will lie the closest to the door and when there is someone at the door, it will be you who always has to do get it. Your roommate will pretend to snore at a volume at that time.

Keys’ Law: The one time you return earlier to the hostel than your roommate is the time you forgot your keys.

Water’s Law: You will feel thirsty only when your water bottle is empty but when it is full you won’t take a drop of the same.

Mess’ Law: The one day when dinner is good at the college mess is when you will be out in the city

Extension of the Mess’ Law: You will never miss the other 6 days’ dinner.

Life’s Law: The girl you are after will be the one every second guy is after.

Blog’s Law: The blog which you think was the best would be completely ignored but the worst blog would be the cynosure of all eyes.

Break The Shackles

Everything in life is a trade off. To get something we have to give up something. The only you have to be careful about is trying to strike a balance between so that it does not affect the nature of things. It seems that I paid a bit too much for a particular transaction which I seem to feeling the pinch for now. Although I am writing a blog about this, It gives me a sense of perverse satisfaction that I, yes, I, who actually challenged mother nature and have ruffled some feathers. Ever since the fact I could think (long time for that to kick start into action) , I’d never have thought that so much could happen cause of me.

Funnily though, I really don’t give a damn anymore. Let me clarify that whatever I did is completely unintentional. Originally I’d feel insecure and see what could/should be the future course of action. But it seems that the time is finally come to play the game according the rules I set. If they feel they were served a bad hand, well read ‘em and weep cause that’s how the dice rolls. I’ve seen it all, the apex and the nadir and staying in any of them gives more insights and learning about people than just being a middleman

Let nature find its own way to restore parity in the system. We as humans are built on chaos, it resides in us. But we are forced to be subdued by society to adapt to the so called ‘norms’ that it creates and makes us like meek ‘yes men’. Chaos is a fundamental attribute in us and denying that would be denying the very thing that makes us human.

Starcraft II- Ficitionally Factual?!

Ok, I never do impromptu posts, I plan and write but this I gotta share with the world..I was at sclegacy.com -

‘As of today IGN has officially listed StarCraft 2 as “Rumored” on their site and is now selectable to be put on your Club IGN Wishlist. And they have also reported on the statement by Itzik Ben Bassat(Vice President Business Development and International for Blizzard Entertainment), publicly uttered the following sentence on at HMV Oxford Street, London last night at the London WOW:BC launch:

I’m a StarCraft player myself and I hope it’s not a decade, and we launched StarCraft in 1998, before I’m standing here again, celebrating the next game in the series,” stated Bassat while on stage‘

And again, to drive me more crazy..

“As of today IGN has officially listed StarCraft 2 as “Rumored” on their site and is now selectable to be put on your Club IGN Wishlist“

Please God, let this be true, I’ve been waiting for this game’s sequel more than anything my whole life!! I leave you with a previous blog link of mine on Starcraft and an awesome pic..

Terran infantry ambush a Protoss patrol

I just hope its not too good to be true